Clothes are beautiful things.

jelly shoes

 

Look at them. Just look. Now look away, and then look back again.

Are they not hideous?

I do believe Topshop are to blame for these hipster monstrosities. Jelly shoes for adults, girls! This is fashion now!

Whether you wear them with socks, tights, bare legs, skirts, shorts, leggings, trousers or nothing at all, you are an adolescent/adult wearing jelly shoes: the timeless classic for beach-going toddlers. Check yourself.

I firmly believe that life is too short to wear ugly shoes, unless forced to or as a gothic statement (which these are not).

Clothes and shoes are beautiful things; they have to be worn, so why not make them attractive? You will be at your happiest when wearing attractive, or at least comfy clothes that you love. I am picky with clothes, which I’ll admit is not always a good thing, but it does mean that I love all my clothes.

The moral? Don’t wear things just because they’re fashionable. Sod ’em all, it is your decision. Love your clothes and they will love you.

-E

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Leggings as Trousers.

Leggings as trousers…

What?

Leggings are designed to be worn under dresses, tunics and long smocks instead of tights. So why do people insist on wearing them in replace of trousers? They’re tight, and show areas that people never want to see… they are designed to be underneath something. They’re too tight to be worn as trousers! You might as well being wearing tights and a t-shirt instead of leggings…

When will people learn that leggings ARE NOT trousers?

Please, remember next time you go out. Wear them UNDER something, not as the main attraction…

-J

UNDERWEAR, NOT OUTERWEAR.

This is becoming increasingly more common and I must wonder, why?

megan_fox_bra

I am all for not being embarrassed about things like bras. Every girl has to wear them, it’s not weird.

However this does take the biscuit somewhat.

I have seen girls at my school talking unashamedly to their male teachers whilst wearing similar outfits to Megan Fox here (I am not targeting this at her, I just looked up pictures and this is what came up).

I don’t know about you, but I personally would not be comfortable discussing my English homework with my 40+ year old, married male teacher (or even female, for that matter) whilst wearing a shirt like this. Think before you put it on please, people  would honestly respect you more. Protect your dignity, it’s an important thing to have.

This is clearly an accident, but it still shouldn't.

This is clearly an accident, but it still shouldn’t be happening.

For starters, don’t wear short skirts if you’re going to be cycling.

I know that in the case of this picture, the reveal of knickers is clearly an accident, but I do still think that you shouldn’t wear a short skirt if there is even the slightest possibility of this happening.

I will close with this: if your clothes do not leave anything about your underwear to the imagination, then what is the point of wearing clothes at all?

It is underwear, not outerwear, people.

-E

 

Shirts and Neon Bras.

The neon bra. Is it necessary?

Shirts and bras. A combination that is necessary, yes! Yet recently, I have seen things that my eyes have never wished to see…

The neon bra.

Okay, I know bras can be ‘cute’, ‘sweet’, ‘sexy’, or any other thing. People say (like me) that it’s only ourselves who shall see them, so what does it matter what they look like? So, then, why are they neon? Such bright colours under white clothing is clearly going to show through; bright pink, outrageous orange and ludicrous green can clearly be seen through white lace shirts, plain t-shirts and any form of blouse.

Why, then, do girls think this is acceptable?

Do you think that your neon nickers being visible under a white skirt is acceptable?

No?

Then how is a bra acceptable?!

This has always perplexed me. Lace blouses and tops look great, especially if you’re going for a vintage look, but if you’re going for a vintage look, why are you not wearing a simple, plain bra underneath? The attention of the often pretty top is taken away by the bra’s outrageous colour… this should not be! Bring the attention back to your clothes, not your underwear. It’s underwear- it should not be obvious! Keep it nicely under your clothing, not shining through it like a beacon of slutty-ness.

So girls… don’t wear the neon bra under a lace blouse. It’s not a good look.

– J

BUM SHORTS.

Really?

Really?

These seem to be a new trend this year.

I like shorts as much as the next person and I have been known to wear them quite a bit in the summer. However this new trend for wearing very short shorts (not always as extreme as these ones, mind you) offends me.

I have seen many people wearing such things at school and around town, and I firmly believe that no matter how hot it is, we should not resort to this.

If you own a pair of shorts even vaguely similar to these and you are considering wearing them at any point in the near future, please just take a moment and think before you put them on; about where you are going to go that day and who will therefore see a considerable amount of your buttocks.

On the one hand, good for you that you are comfortable enough in your body to have no qualms about displaying your bum to the general public.

On the other hand, YOUR ARSE IS ON SHOW. Please check yourself. Think of the pensioners and children whom you do not know and yet are assaulting with the sight of your bare derriere.

Ladies, I do believe the rule of thumb is that if arsecheeks are on display then what you are wearing should in fact be worn as a pair of knickers. Kind regards.

-E